Four Eyes

We have officially made it to the 6 month mark. I remember when Anderson turned 6 months old we had a little pirate party to celebrate. Seems kind of ironic and very fitting in hindsight. (sight! pun intended) Anyway, I think about that first day of patching & how scared and worried I was. Now, it seems mostly hilarious that I thought 2 hours of patching was a big deal. There is no exaggeration that the "eye" has totally dominated our lives for the past months. It is literally the first thing I think about in the morning (no lights until it's on! Get him while he is disoriented!), the first thing Brandon asks me about (we don't have to even say the word. I know what he means when he says, "how is he today?") & ALWAYS in the back of my mind (usually the front, too).

I think about him being "four eyes" & realized that could describe the way I feel most days. My FIRST EYE is proud, so proud of this boy, a baby really, who puts up with a smudgy view through the one eye he actually has access to during the day. Even when he takes it off, he will let us distract him with a truck or bubbles so we can sneak it back on. When it is all said & done, he is the one who deserves all of the credit. Think about it, 6 years (if we are lucky) of patching is almost as long as he will be a teenager, the time between kindergarten & middle school, 5 more years than he had a bottle, 3 times as long as he will wear diapers. The kicker for me is that he won't have a birthday or Christmas without a patch until he is 7 or 8. But, he plays. He grins. He giggles. He prefers my lap over all else despite the fact that I am usually forcing a bandaid on his eye. He is building up determination, flexibility and the best life lesson anyone can learn, sucking it up. I guess I needed a refresher in those areas, too. I am picturing a really cool "tell us something interesting about you" story when he is older. My SECOND EYE is the bad eye, really. It's the eye that carries jealousy, frustration, anger and all of those things that I try to pretend aren't there. But, I can't help it. I hear people complain because they can't keep their diaper on their toddler. While sneaky poop & embarrassment are not fun, I have no sympathy. People complain when their kids are sick & they have to give them medicine. The 30 seconds of medicine twice a day. I agree, this sucks. But, all I can think is the fact that the patch is every minute of all but one of his waking hours. This isn't something that lasts 10 days. Or, I notice that they don't flinch and spaz when they hear a sticker taken off a banana in the produce section. Their kid's skin isn't bleeding & raw or puffy & irritated because it's hot outside. The first thing on their packing list isn't patches, it's probably something normal like diapers. This eye, thank goodness, is usually overshadowed by my THIRD EYE, which is my grateful eye. My resentment of good eyes is usually erased almost as soon as it starts to appear. I am definitely aware of how many awful things could be happening, with which this pales in comparison. Like transparent pale. I am grateful that we have Aunt Paula & we found it, grateful that we have 2 grandmas close enough to us to make it ok, grateful for an understanding husband who know when I snap at him it's really because I am worried, grateful that sisters and friends are on my side even when they hear the same frustrations, complaints, concerns everyday, grateful for Kraftypatches & Miraflex glasses, grateful for Dr. Cogen & grateful for this perfect, perfect boy. My FOURTH EYE is really the one that most of you can see because you have it, too. It's the Mommy eye; the eye that is determined, researched, unyielding, committed and unconditional . It's the eye that knows everything is going to be ok. And, that my kid is really the most perfect boy in the world. :)