Imagine a 1 year old. Imagine taking that 1 year old to the mall. Imagine the trail of mum mum & goldfish that follow you. The tantrums in the stroller. The throwing on the floor (or at innocent shoppers) whatever you hand them to act as a distraction. Clearly, toddlerhood is not the best behaved time of anyone's life. Now, just for fun, imagine adding a large adhesive bandaid to the mix. One that has to be stuck to said one year old's eye for "more than half of his waking hours". Imagine walking beside the stroller so you can hold one of his arm's down & be ready in half a second if he tries to pull the patch off. (he can do it in a second, so I literally have to stop it in half) Chugging your water so you can, in a last ditch effort, distract him with the bottle/lid. Carrying him, holding his arms down, pushing the stroller while he is screaming. Public staring. Loving him so much you know you have to do it. Kind of loving him even a little extra because you know it's so unfair for him. Knowing this is not an option, but really, really hating the whole experience.
But I am not throwing a pity party. (It's more like a pity small gathering) Anderson is curious, active, snuggly and stinking cute. He doesn't realize what is happening except that he is inconvenienced. The doctor appointments, the surgery, the patching, the glasses...we have to do these things for his sight. Children can completely lose vision in the cataract eye. But not my son. Not today of the mall fiasco & not tomorrow of the "fill in the blank" fiasco. I am a pretty determined person, married to an even more determined person, daughter of maybe the most determined person I've ever known & a bandaid (or a few hundred at the rate we're going) is not going to stop us.
You can do it! Screw "public" - Anderson is already smarter and better than most of those judging people anyway.
ReplyDeleteI just have to say - you are awesome. The public can go to hell. It definitely sucks, but years down the road you will look back, laugh, and probably even miss those moments. Oh, and I meant to tell you on your post about his cataract issue and him maybe not being able to wear contacts - first, glasses on kids are quite possibly the cutest thing ever (nicole is right about the jerry maguire kid) and in 10 years or so when he is even at the age where he could wear contacts a lot will probably have changed with the technology and maybe he will be able to wear them. I know you know there are much worse things that can happen to him, but you are completely justified and normal to be angry, scared, sad, and have the "why him" feelings. I know y'all will get through this and someday he will be looking back and reading your blog (using both eyes!) and thinking what an amazing mom he has.
ReplyDeleteLove you honey, Anderson is lucky to have you and Brandon.
ReplyDeleteYou're right. It does kind of suck. Actually it totally sucks and it's completely unfair that you guys all have to go through this. You are allowed to be annoyed and upset by this - in fact, if you want to throw a pity bonanza we can do that. Just name the time and place. :) You deserve it.
ReplyDeleteOh, you and Brandon are going to win this, no doubt.
ReplyDeletePublic sucks. And, I dare Public to say something or judge when the godmother is around. It will be worse than when Lily cried in the hotel and Aunt Sissa had to cuss out a security guard. I will hurt somebody. I am seriously getting made just sitting her here, thinking about nonexistent confrontations.
Also, I have definitely camped out at the pity gathering. I will be there with you, maybe crying more often, even. Sorry. It is all I can do to help. Just distract you with my evident need for my own pity party about Bugs Bunny. It sucks to feel helpless but it is amazing to see my sister ready to do whatever she has to do for her boy. You will win; you were born for this challenge, to battle as a mommy for your boy.
Room.
Hang in there kiddo! He is strong, comes from strong people and has a wonderful support system. Knowing Brandon's side of the family, stubborn doesn't even begin to describe the genes this kid's got!! Love to you all. Smoochies to lil A!!
ReplyDeleteGreat Aunt Lo-Lo
ok well Nicole's comment on top of your post has my choking on sobs over here (damn pregnancy hormones). The love and support you two share is amazing.
ReplyDeleteNicole is right though, you will win and you were born for this challenge. Anderson is SO lucky to have you for a mommy-a mommy who will fight whatever fight necessary for her little man. And like everyone else said-SCREW PUBLIC! Most of them are ignorant, judgmental idiots anyway.
I'm sorry you, Brandon, and Anderson have to go through this trial. It does suck, and you are entitled to pity parties every once in a while. It's hard to see your baby hurt or sad in any way.
Not to get all Jesus-y on you, I'm sadly not the most Jesus-y person, but I want to share a verse that really, really has brought me so much peace, strength, and reassurance when I have struggled through hard times and situations.
"Be still, and know that I am God" (Psalm 46:10)
So simple. But sometimes so hard to remember. Hopefully, it will help you feel a little stronger on the days you might be struggling.
Only 24% of Public finishes college, did you know that? So, I must agree with the last comment, Public is ignorant. In the great words of Dr. Seuss “Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.” Anderson "Patch" Glover will get through this and while it doesn't seem like it now, this will help him grow to be as strong as his parents and grandparents. We are all given different crosses to bare, never fair, never easy, but what we learn from those events is what makes us better people.
ReplyDeleteugh, patching is hard enough, but doing it with a one year old is brutal, and then you add going out in public... I'm pretty much in awe. You're doing an amazing job for your son. I won't try to tell you it gets easier, but it gets more routine, and as you say, his sight is worth it.
ReplyDeleteI just came across your blog through the post on littlefoureyes. Great post. This post hits home too. The exhaustion that comes with going out during patchtime cannot be understood by anyone but another mom or dad going through it. good luck on your journey!
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